Several of Scottoline’s Philadelphia Enquirer Chick Flick columns appear in My Third Husband Will Be A Dog. Since Scottoline calls her two exes “Thing One and Thing Two” and obviously adores her canine housemates, the title is apt.
This collection’s theme comes from Eleanor Roosevelt, another remarkable woman with literary gifts, who said, “A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong she is until she’s in hot water.”
Scottoline salutes her mother who once announced, “I’m not afraid of death. Death is afraid of me.” She acquaints us with her daughter, Francesca, who is also a writer, her close friends (“If I killed somebody they would show up with shovels and Hefty bags.”), her four dogs, two cats, chickens and pony, and she promises her female readers, “You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll swear off pantyhose.”
Her musings include realization of the fact that ‘50s families had one marriage and one pet dog while current relationships include several divorces and several pet dogs.
She admits to a love of reading house-for-sale ads although she has no plans to move. She encourages us to learn from Betty and Veronica (Archie Comics), and cautions women to wear bras continually because they might have to go to the emergency room and, if they’re braless, they’ll scare the young interns.
Scottoline also has her likes. She admires Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie because, “Not only do they spend time with their kids; they wear their kids. They’re holding at least two children at all times; one is . . . draped around a shoulder like a noisy handbag.” She loves dandelions because, “They make me happy every time I see them.” She loves the gaudy jewelry her mother gifted her with because, “ . . .when I look at that awful stuff I see what I love the most. Her.”
Her final advice comes from “ . . .that great philosopher, James Taylor. Shower the people you love with love.”
If you are interested in this book or would like to learn more, contact me at info@bouldercity magazine.com.
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